...also, the reason I feel I have lost control and I am drowning is along with the previous issue I posted, my son just broke his arm bad.  I am so glad he is ok but he had to go to the emrgency room and have a specialist fix his arm.  I know this is going to be alot and I don't have it...  it is only a matter of time.

Two years ago I lost my Job and I was out of work for a year. I have a good job now but when I was out of work I got way into debt... far more than I should have because I was too proud and too stuborn to ask for help from family, etc.  Now I have a home equity loan (maxed) credit cards (maxed) and what I bring in is not enough to make the payment and provide the minimums for my family.  I have sold things on ebay and other things like like to feel the gab but I am at the end of my rope I was suppose to get a raise but that didn't happen.  I know I will be getting a promotion in September but I feel I won't make it.  I am already drowning and my family/wife knows things are tight but they don't know how bad it is.  I don't won't them to worry or go without the basics opportunities they deserve.  I, myself have sacrifed about everything I have and have gone without lunches and buy clothes, etc. So my family will have what they need.  It is not so bad that I am in danger of losing my home but I feel I am on the brink of creditors contacting me and pressuring me and pushing me over the edge.  Of course, then my family will know and that will make me feel like a complete failure.  I sometimes dream of walking down the street and finding $5,000... just enough to get me through.  I never fantisize of getting/winning huge amounts of money because I feel like I am the one that needs to pay off the debt since I was the one that got my family here.  I even work overtime every chance I get just to get an additional gulp of air as I slowly sink.  I am looking for any ideas/suggestions that could carry me through.